Jason Cox & Topo Pal — Lightning Talks Introduction

[Comedic banter — Jason and Topo trade lines back and forth in a vaudeville-style intro.]

Speaker A: Hello. Hey everyone.

Speaker B: Well, so it turns out that lightning talks were extra fast today. How'd you like that? That was good. So that's a wrap. Thank you all.

Speaker A: What? Oh no, no, no more. There's more, actually. There's more.

Speaker B: Yeah. Hey, there's — so welcome everyone to the DevOps Enterprise Summit lightning talks!

Speaker A: What? What, what? It's not DevOps Enterprise Summit. That was last year.

Speaker B: What?

Speaker A: It's ETLS now.

Speaker B: ETLs? Yeah. Like extract, transform, load.

Speaker A: Oh, just like data — but with like, people.

Speaker B: Yeah. Like extract.

Speaker A: Yeah — extracting them out of like old ways of working and silos.

Speaker B: Break them out of the silo. Yeah. Just breaking — like give them a slip, break them off silos. That's it.

Speaker A: And then transform — like culturally transform them.

Speaker B: Transform the culture. Yes.

Speaker A: And, like, bring changes —

Speaker B: Oh, I got it.

Speaker A: And then you wanna load…

Speaker B: Yes. Go infect your company. Yes. Take the virus in.

Speaker A: That's what we're talking about, right? Yeah. With virus. Yeah — just like empower everyone.

Speaker B: That's virus. Oh, that's a virus for sure. Empowering people.

Speaker A: Yes — virus. You know, things like —

Speaker B: Contagious. Just, just-do-it kind of thing.

Speaker A: Yeah, that's a virus.

Speaker B: Oh, this totally makes sense. Now I get it.

Speaker A: Yeah. So that's the ETL part.

Speaker B: ETL. But I don't understand — what's the S?

Speaker A: Do it over and over again.

Speaker B: Oh… Oh. That's across your whole enterprise.

Speaker A: It's plural. ETLs.

Speaker B: So welcome to the ETLs Lightning Talk! We're so happy to be here. Go ahead —

Speaker A: Hang on. We are still stuck with DevOps. DevOps is dead. All the CI/CD pipelines that ever needed to be created have already been created.

Speaker B: Oh.

Speaker A: And no more that. And we have Kubernetes and YAML files.

Speaker B: Oh, that's right, that's right. It's all YAML from, you know, all the way down.

Speaker A: So it is ETLS.

Speaker B: What? ETLS. Ah —

Speaker A: So you know what ETLS means?

Speaker B: Ah, yes. Let's be serious. That's right — Enterprise Technology Leadership Summit. Welcome to our Lightning Talk!

Speaker A: Hey, so we got a good show for you tonight.

Speaker B: Yes. Yes.

Speaker A: And thank you for all the sponsors. So you heard from Lucid, and then we have Robert Half and Google — the other sponsors — and we have a line of excellent speakers today. So enjoy, see, have fun.

Speaker B: Domingo. And all right. Here they come — man is up.